If Only
by yayoiichi
Summary: AU Sasori always has like Deidara since they were in high school. When he decided to convey his feelings, it was too late. How can Sasori accept the truth? R


If Only

Summary: AU Sasori always has like Deidara since they were in high school. When he decided to convey his feelings, it was too late. How can Sasori accept the truth? R&R

A/N: Hello, this is my first story in ff, I hope you guys will like it. Deidara is a girl in this story, I hate gender bend but it can't be help. Reason why? You'll know if you read the story.

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto!

/././././././././

It was a rainy morning; Akasuna Sasori was woken up by the ringing of his cell phone. He covered his face with his pillow and let the phone ring for a couple of seconds. Sasori then decided to pick it up. He took the phone and look at the name of the caller; Deidara.

Sasori put a small smile in his face and answer the call, "Hello?" he answered. "Hey! Why did it take so long for you to answer?" asked Deidara. Sasori was happy hearing the voice of his friend. "You woke me up." Sasori complained, yawning. Deidara was quiet for a minute, "Sorry about that. I have some good news and I need to tell you in person. Let's meet at the usual place, 5pm sharp!" she exclaimed.

The red head stands up and look outside, "Alright! I have something to tell you too!" he responds. Deidara giggled, "Bye. See you later." with that Deidara hang up. Sasori rested his chin in his palm, "I'll finally tell her." he smiled to himself.

/././././././././

It was 5pm; Sasori was in the café, the place where they are going to meet. The place they always hang out when they were in high school, even after college. Sasori saw Deidara come in the café, she wave her hand and walk towards the table where Sasori was sited. Deidara put her bag down and sited in the chair in front of Sasori's.

Sasori sip at his coffee, "So, what's this good news?" he questioned, looking at Deidara. Deidara smiled, "I'm getting married!" she exclaimed, showing Sasori her right hand, where her engagement ring was. Sasori was shock and his eyes widened. He then put an artificial smile, "That's wonderful! Who's the lucky guy?" he asks. Deidara hold his hand, "Uchicha Itachi!" she smiled. Sasori look outside still shock. Why did it have to be his best friend? Sasori remembered he hasn't told Itachi that he likes Deidara, because he knew that Itachi likes Deidara too.

"Hey. Sasori," she started and look outside, "You're the first one I told about my engagement." She said, still wearing a smile on her face. Sasori glance outside and look at his engaged friend, "Really?" he force a smile. Deidara nodded and drink her coffee, "Sasori, what are you going to say?" she asked. Sasori scratched the back of his head, "Oh! It's nothing important." he lied. She blinked, "Is that so?" Deidara tilt her head a little. Sasori nodded and finished his coffee; "Deidara, I'll be going now." he stands up and waves his hand. "Bye!" she smiled and waves back.

/././././././././

Sasori head towards the parking lot and head to his car. He saw Deidara looking at him, he look at her. Deidara then wave her hand and smile, Sasori just return a smile. Sasori turned around and open the door of his car. He entered and leaned down and covered his eyes. Deidara mouthed the words "Goodbye…"

/././././././././

'_Do you still remember when we first meet Deidara?'_

_Sasori was relaxing under a tree in the park. He look at the people and then at the clouds. Deidara and her friends were playing catch. The ball that they were playing with rolled to his direction. He then crouches down to pick it up. When Sasori stood up, Deidara was in front of him. Sasori gave Deidara the ball back, Deidara lowered her head a little._

_Deidara's playmates called for her to hurry up. "Iwa, how long is it to take a ball?"_

_'So that's her name.' Sasori thought._

/././././././././

'_Do you still remember the next time we saw each other Deidara?'_

_It was the first day of junior high. Sasori remembered when his eyes lightened when he saw Deidara. Sasori smiled and held out a hand. "I'm Akasuna Sasori. Nice to meet you"_

_The whole class watches them with interest, Deidara's face turning red. Deidara's voice shook, "Ni-nice to meet you, Akasuna-san. I'm Iwa Deidara."_

_Noticing Deidara's discomfort, lowered his voice, "Don't mind them." he smiled._

_That was when the two became friends._

/././././././././

'_Do you remember when I steal your first kiss?'_

_It was summer, after junior high. Pein had invited the two in his party. The both of them snuck out to have some fresh air. Sasori was a little drunk from the 'non-alcoholic' drinks._

_Sasori leaned towards Deidara. Then his lips were on Deidara's and Deidara's arms were around his neck._

'_Did he kissed me because his drunk?' Deidara thought._

/././././././././

Sasori knock at Pein's door. Pein opened the door, seeing Sasori…crying. "Come in." Sasori comes inside, while Pein closes the door. Sasori and Pein went to the living room. Pein takes a sit at the coach and lean down. "What's wrong?" he asked. Sasori seats in the coach in front of Pein. "Deidara is getting married to I-Itachi." his voice shook. Pein's eyes widened at his statement. Pein was Sasori's friend since they were little and the first one to notice that he likes Deidara.

Pein stands up and walk towards his friend. He pat him in the shoulder, "Have a good cry." he look at Sasori. The red head was keeping his feelings when he was in high school. Sasori covered his eyes with both of his hands, "Deidara…" he cried. Pein goes to the kitchen. After a couple of minutes, he went back with two cups of coffee in his hands. He put the coffee in front of Sasori. "Thank you."

Pein look at his fingers and started counting. "You have like Deidara for eight years." he said in shock. Sasori was still crying, not looking at his friend. Pein sits at the coach, "Do you want to stay here for tonight?" he asked. Sasori nodded in silence.

The two went to Pein's room. Sasori lay down on Pein's bed and Pein was looking at his closet for Sasori to wear. He took out a pajama and turn around to see Sasori asleep. Pein let out a sigh. He moves Sasori a little to the left so that he can lie down. 'This is the first time I saw him like this.' He closed his eyes.

/././././././././

"_Sasori!" Deidara called out. Sasori wave his hand. The two of them went to the roof to eat their lunch. When Sasori opened the door to the roof they saw Pein waiting for them impatiently. "You two are so slow!" Pein yelled at them. Deidara sat beside Pein and Sasori sat beside her "Another girl confessed to Sasori." Deidara said, opening her bento._

_Pein grin at Sasori. The red head look at Pein, "What's with you?" Sasori drink his coffee. "Hey, Sasori, Some students think you two are going out." he said teasingly. Deidara glance at Sasori and look back to her bento, trying to hide her pinkish face. "Pein, that's the third girl this month." she stated._

_Sasori sighed and rested his chin on his palm and his palm on his knees. "If you don't want girls to like you…stop being gorgeous!" Pein said teasingly. Deidara started laughing._

_After school they hang out at a fast food restaurant. Pein was in line to order their food. Deidara stared at Sasori, "So Sasori, do you like someone?" Sasori scoff. Sasori sited straight and fix himself, "What makes you say that?" he glance outside the window. Deidara started playing with her hair, "Umm… because you have been rejecting their confessions." she answered, lowering her head. Sasori look at Deidara, "I don't have a crush on someone," he lied, "and why would I go out with someone I don't even like." he said. Deidara look at the wall paper of her phone, "You have a point." she giggles._

/././././././././

Sasori's dream ended by the sound of Pein's alarm clock, he stands up and exits the room and goes to the kitchen. "You're already awake." Pein look at the entrance of the kitchen. Sasori walk towards the fridge to get some water, "Your clock wake me up." he responds. Pein lean on the wall and face Sasori, "Come here." he said. Sasori walk towards him with a questioning look. "I have something important to tell you." he looks at Sasori in the eyes.

"Dei told me not to tell this to anyone especially you." he begun and cross his arms. "Do you remember my party after junior high?" Pein asked. The red head nodded, "She told me that the two of you kissed, she was thinking if it was because you were drunk. At that time Dei really likes you. How many chances have you let slip your finger?" Pein paused and look at Sasori's expression, Sasori was shock at what Pein had said. "When we were in third year high school, that's the time when we meet Itachi. You two started becoming distant-"

"That's enough. I get it." He interrupted. Pein sighed and smiled, "Come on, let's eat breakfast." he sat at his chair. Deidara followed him and sit beside him.

/././././././././

The doors which had shut at the entrance opened. A figure, dressed stunningly in pure white, walked slowly down the aisle. Her father stood at her side, guiding her. Her face was covered with a gossamer veil but her eyes could be seen looking directly at Itachi, her love for him shining through them. Sasori lowered his eyes as the first notes of Wagner's 'Bridal Chorus' sounded from the pipe organ on the side.

The smile that Deidara gave Itachi, as she took her rightful place by his side was the one that Deidara had once only shown Sasori. Sasori bit down hard on his lower lip and looked down again hoping that no one saw his wet eyes. 'Why does it still hurt so much? Deidara…'

How he wish it had turned out differently.

/././././././././

As the Officiate said the final words to the ceremony and Itachi lifted Deidara's veil and kissed her deeply, passionately, Sasori couldn't look at the two. Quietly, he slipped away into an adjoining chamber knowing that no one would even look for him, in the upcoming chaos known as the reception. Sasori sat in silence, contemplating what could have been. Footsteps sounded from behind and I quickly turned around. It was Pein.

"Pein," he looked away from his gaze. Pein patted Sasori in the back.

"Cry it out." Sasori's eyes filled with held back tears. Once Sasori started crying, he couldn't stop. He held onto Pein and let it all go.

"It's alright." He stroked Sasori's hair, "It's fine to let it out,"

When Sasori's tears finally ran out, Pein didn't left Sasori alone. Sasori felt comforted by Pein's presence. Pein pull the both into a secluded corner of the room when footsteps sounded outside and the door to the chamber was pushed open.

Konan and Tobi walked in. Both of them were school friends of him and Pein. Konan sat herself down into a chair and Tobi sat into one next to her. Both of them sat with their backs at Pein and Sasori.

"I can't believe Deidara went through with this without a fight," Konan said, fixing her hair.

"Why do you say that?" Tobi's voice was surprisingly quiet.

Konan smiled, "Because Deidara loves someone else. She always has."

Tobi sat up a little straighter, "I know that, as does everyone else who knows her like we do. But we also know that if she didn't go through with this marriage, she will never see Sasori again."

Konan leaned back in her seat, "Life is cruel."

Sasori stands up and ran out of the other door in the room that was located behind where he stood. He ran outside just in time to see Deidara enter the car, your eyes met mine and he saw the pain in his gaze.

Deidara stared in his direction for a moment longer before Itachi called for your attention. Deidara's lips moved and formed three little words. 'Was that for me?' she turned away and look at Itachi. Sasori watched as it drove away, taking Deidara and Itachi to their honeymoon.

_'Deidara… If only…'_

Sasori turned away. Walking quickly away from the crowds, he smiled. Those three words she had never said to Sasori, those three words that Sasori had never said to her.

"I love you too, Deidara."

/././././././././

How was it? Good, bad, terrible? I know it's really short but I hope you guys like it. Please review that would make me happy. XD


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